What Have You Got For Me?
23 February 2025 Real Deep Recovery
Let’s start with the Announcement that I am renaming this Daily Meditation. I’m aligning my writing to my upcoming book, which has become the focus of my daily writing and hence, my life — Real Deep Recovery. It has been my life, really, for the past 16,004 days. I confess, I did take a few days (years) off from attending meetings, but what that taught me, was that I needed to return and be more attentive to how to work a disciplined program in daily life. It paid off handsomely.
Here’s the new banner for my blog:
This is really about spiritual recovery, in the biggest sense of the word spiritual — that meaning that you are free to define it however you see fit. Saying that, I’ve decided the most effective way to use this space is to speak more clearly, be more present and in the moment, and invite you to do the same. I hope you will.
So I’ll tell you a personal story about how that works for me. You’ve heard me say, if you follow this column, that I rise in the morning and say, “Well God, what have you got for me today?” Then I watch, listen and wait. Each day, something is bound to happen. It never fails. It can be mundane, or it can be rather thrilling. Sometimes it is dreadful, something I would rather not do! This week was full of things like that. I’ve been learning a lesson of self-care, kind of like, “Watch what you pray for.” But all in all, there are always spiritual lessons, things to be learned from life and I never regret that!
This morning I rose in my usual way, except that I overslept, having done more than usual yesterday, ending with a spirited dinner with friends in the program, rowdy and full of laughter, out later than usual. I had spent the day pushing to get work done on my book, trying to sort some financial matters, not giving myself time for my usual afternoon nap. I watched a little TV with my husband before falling promptly asleep on the couch, rising to a quiet house and going to bed with my beloved Trixie, sleeping soundly past my usual waking time. Nice!
As I was having a quiet time and doing my grateful list, I was aware that I am still quietly peeved about the happenings of the past week, in which a friend who is mentally challenged has been struggling to get some balance. She has been bullied in several places she goes. I am struggling with my own powerlessness to be of help to her. It’s simply beyond my realm…it’s her problem and she must deal with it, and the other parties will not listen to what I have to say. Powerless!
I pray, I weep, I struggle with what is beyond my control. I turn it over and take it back. I speak with my mentors, I write, I walk, I talk to my chickens. Gradually I lose my hold. I speak with my friend who beseeches me to help her, in ways I can’t do. I start over again…
This morning my eyes fall upon a blog post by the poet, Padraig O’ Tuama. Remember, I ask, God, what have you got for me?! A beautiful post in which Padraig says, “What have you noticed this week?” He shifts my focus. He tells a simple story of a man he notices on a train, and how his presence catches his eye and his mind. In the process of noticing deeply, he is caught in thought. His thought catches my thought. I am shifted.
He asks the question, after noticing this man sitting with closed eyes, phone clasped to his chest: “What do we do to bring comfort?” I remember the act of hugging my friend on Friday night. I remember presenting her with some choices she could not see herself. Comfort.
I ask myself, “What do I do to bring comfort to myself?” I remember that Thich Nhat Hanh says that if we do not love ourselves, we cannot bring love and comfort to anyone else. Comfort.
In these difficult dark times, where so many of us are churning like my friend, it is so important that we find a way to bring comfort to ourselves, before we try to turn outward to comfort others. In his post, Padraig talks about a friend who would place a hand alongside his own cheek in memory of a friend who used to do that for him. That feeling of a comforting hand in a time of trouble…
What do you do to comfort your self in times of trouble? Do you reach out to a friend? When my friend found me on Friday night, cold and hungry and lost, the first thing she did was reach out both hands, palms up, looking to hold the hands of a person who was safe. Comfort.
What can you do for the people around you who are suffering? This is not a time of sides. This is about neighbors, community, kindness, connection. Look into the eyes of those around you. When you make connection with others and meet the eyes of strangers, you feel that you have done something honest and good.
Real Deep Recovery is about being a person among persons, a citizen of the world around you. It is about honesty, open-mindedness and willingness. It is about the feeling you get in your heart when you know you have done a simple thing, the next right thing, and done it well.
Namaste.